You can be anything you want to be. That’s a good starting place. Anything else and you sell yourself short and compromise your dreams. Your dreams have wings but no feet, no ground, until you put yourself in them and give them life.
You will never achieve anything you don’t decide you want to try to reach. That’s a reality.
You must decide to become who you want to be. Then you can make plans to become that person– to learn the skills, meet the challenges, overcome the obstacles and focus the energy necessary to achieve your success.
The Lord has blessed me with a beautiful talent. Yet I am not told how to use it. I must put forth the effort and time to understand the nature of it, listen with an open heart, not a busy mind, and be at peace. God will allow it to unfold within me, as I am able to accept, and receive his gift.
It seems on every journey, you meet resistance and frustration with yourself. It’s stupid really because the point of self exploration is to relax, do not judge, do not critique the progress. Yet I have reached this point, AGAIN, where I am judging myself, beating myself up for not being where, in my mind, I have decided I should be. Where should I be exactly? The smart answer is, exactly where I am. Not good enough for my ever demanding ego. I want to escape this revolving door of being at peace with myself, and then berating myself. I am not satisfied at where I am at in life, my marriage, yoga. If I step back and look at myself with a calm non-judgmental attitude I would see that I am doing fine, actually wonderful. Because I am working for what I want. I am striving to reach a higher plane. Yet, with my ego goggles on, I feel I am struggling, barely keeping my head above water. I feel my progress isn’t enough, I am slacking off, being lazy. It’s such a frustrating cycle of building up and then just tearing back down. What do I have to prove though? Why do I feel this immense time limit on growth and progress? To make matters worse I have somehow screwed up my left wrist and it can’t bear and weight or pressure. It’s going to set back my yoga practice and makes general life a pain in the ass. ARgh I am so frustrated. I tried my yoga practice this afternoon and it was so difficult. I could barely do Down Dog with the brace and without it not at all. Time to re-center and refocus but boy am I tired of being my own worst enemy.
In my adventures becoming a Yoga Instructor, I have done a lot of personal research, not just to become a better teacher but a better person as well. So much I have learned through yoga echos what I believe in religiously and has really opened my mind with clarity on certain areas of life. The effects have been quite amazing and for this I am grateful. I can see myself becoming calmer, less panic attacks (or freak outs as I like to call them) and, while becoming more hands on with the positive choices, things that can cause stress and drama I have become more detached. The joy of becoming more detached with the chaotic aspects of life is that I am finding more time for myself and for my loved ones. Time to work on projects, time to spend out walking with my dog, time for more baking! Its astounding the amount of time we spend on a daily basis worrying about things that really don’t need a second thought!
I wrote this little piece to tie in with one of my classes, a sort of meditation piece to open with and give students something to reflect on while they are working through their asana’s. It is based on some of the teachings of the famous yogis, B.K.S Iyengar. Now you don’t have to be a yogis to reap the benefits of yoga practice, a lot of it is mental well-being. I believe God has many tools and platforms with to which he can reach His children in a way befitting their unique minds, Yoga is that tool for me and maybe it can be yours as well.
Balance is something we all struggle with, whether in our physical yoga practice or simply in our everyday lives. Every living thing around us strives for balance. However, change is what disturbs balance and of course life being the curious thing that it is, change is the one thing that is constant in this world. Do not fret though, without imperfection or imbalance, life would be dull. It would be meaningless! The struggle for balance is a dance that is essential to Life!
Imagine a tree. A tree is strong, the trunk is hard and dense, giving it a good foundation from which to grow. Yet it is flexible, able to sway in the wind. If the wind counts as change and the tree wasn’t able to move with it or, “go with the flow”, the dense foundation would mean nothing. The tree would eventually break and fall. So to be flexible or, “dynamic” adds to the density of the tree, making it that much stronger and amazing. However a tree wants more from life than to be strong and sway in the breeze. It wants to grow, to reach for the sun, produce leaves and fruit. It loves to give shade and protection, to be a home. This is what gives a tree luminosity. With its protective quality, the tree is tranquil. The gift of leaves and fruit is a quality of alertness. The continuing quest to reach for the sun, is clarity.
Using a tree as an example in the strive for balance is the perfect example. As we go through life or work through our asana’s, we want to be as strong in our foundation as the tree, but we also want to be dynamic and flexible. For us, using the breath as a tool for this is much the same how the tree uses the earth, drawing in what we need for our minds and bodies. Lastly, in our quest for balance, we involve our minds, to stay alert, yet more importantly, calm and accepting.
It is a struggle, a dance we will forever be learning, but enormously rewarding. We may never find perfect balance but isn’t it said that the journey, not the destination, is what matters most?