This Little Light of Mine

3 Jan

“I know what I’m gonna do tomorrow, and the next day, and the next year, and the year after that.”

Pretty sure I used that quote last year at this time, but it is from such an amazing movie, I think it deserves re-use.  Besides it is exactly how I am feeling now, with a new year spread out before me, like a buffet table, amazing and difficult choices laid out for me to mull over.  Like the quote says, I know what I want, and most importantly, I KNOW WHO I AM!  So exciting to say that, so fulfilling and rewarding.  After how many years of struggle and tears, insecurities and heartache, I have made it to the top of that jumbled heap that was my adolescence and am victorious!  I definitely don’t have life down to a science, and I know I am still gonna make a few bad choices, but I am strong in who I am, who God wants me to be, and  I am not going to change for anybody or anything.

I am still dealing with fear, but I know now that it can’t stop me.   I am stronger in the Lord then I have ever been and He has shown me who I can trust, and with all His grace and wisdom, has shown me not to fear the people I can’t trust.  It is an amazing thing to have fear lifted from your shoulders.  Pain is an awful, horrible thing, but a part of life that I can face, standing tall and confident.  I am not weak, I am so strong, stronger than I ever realized.  My values and morals have been constant friends,  a light given by my Savior to guide my path.  Much like that  song sung in every Sunday School class for ages, “This Little Light of Mine”.  My light has wavered in the wind, dwindled to near nothingness, almost swallowed by the dark, but it has never gone out, nor will it ever, and for that I am so very thankful.

Trust me, I know I am not perfect, in fact I can see my road of growth stretching out in front of me, it’s dark with uncertainty as is reality.  The thing that is exciting me so much is that I no longer have to be afraid of it.  My life is something for me to delight in, enjoy, learn from, grow from.

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2 Responses to “This Little Light of Mine”

  1. Cheryl Beckwith January 3, 2012 at 4:56 pm #

    This is awesome.I love it.Brava!!!

    • thehippiehousewife January 3, 2012 at 7:19 pm #

      Thank you! It’s amazing how when something bad happens in your life, something good happens to counter act it and this epiphany was the good. It has given me such a fresh outlook on the new year.

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