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Fallen Angel Pose

1 Apr

Fallen Angel Pose

You can be anything you want to be. That’s a good starting place. Anything else and you sell yourself short and compromise your dreams. Your dreams have wings but no feet, no ground, until you put yourself in them and give them life.
You will never achieve anything you don’t decide you want to try to reach. That’s a reality.
You must decide to become who you want to be. Then you can make plans to become that person– to learn the skills, meet the challenges, overcome the obstacles and focus the energy necessary to achieve your success.
Rob Kall

A Meditation

24 Feb

 The Lord has blessed me with a beautiful talent.  Yet I am not told how to use it.  I must put forth the effort and time to understand the nature of it, listen with an open heart, not a busy mind, and be at peace.  God will allow it to unfold within me, as I am able to accept, and receive his gift.

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Frustration and My Stupid Wrist

5 Mar

It seems on every journey, you meet resistance and frustration with yourself.  It’s stupid really because the point of self exploration is to relax, do not judge, do not critique the progress.  Yet I have reached this point, AGAIN, where I am judging myself, beating myself up for not being where, in my mind, I have decided I should be.  Where should I be exactly?  The smart answer is, exactly where I am.  Not good enough for my ever demanding ego.  I want to escape this revolving door of being at peace with myself, and then berating myself.  I am not satisfied at where I am at in life, my marriage, yoga.  If I step back and look at myself with a calm non-judgmental attitude I would see that I am doing fine, actually wonderful.  Because I am working for what I want.  I am striving to reach a higher plane.  Yet, with my ego goggles on, I feel I am struggling, barely keeping my head above water.  I feel my progress isn’t enough, I am slacking off, being lazy.  It’s such a frustrating cycle of building up and then just tearing back down.  What do I have to prove though?  Why do I feel this immense time limit on growth and progress?  To make matters worse I have somehow screwed up my left wrist and it can’t bear and weight or pressure.  It’s going to set back my yoga practice and makes general life a pain in the ass.  ARgh I am so frustrated.  I tried my yoga practice this afternoon and it was so difficult.  I could barely do Down Dog with the brace and without it not at all.  Time to re-center and refocus but boy am I tired of being my own worst enemy.

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A New Day

1 Mar
Outside the box, beyond the comfort zone, leaving familiarity behind;  this is what I will be doing today.  I am filling in for my teacher at her school while she takes a mini trip to a weekend retreat.  So I am playing teacher, or shall we say practicing?  For soon enough it will be April and I will be a certified Yogi!  Looking back through my blog, at the new, unsuspecting housewife I was, not knowing what adventure laid out before me.  I am all a flutter today!  I am feeling powerful, uncertain, excited, scared, and to top it off, one with the world around me.  So to encourage this one-ness and maybe to guide you on a little journey of self exploration yourself, I will leave you with some beautiful images of this world around us to enjoy!  Namaste!

From the blog Oh, Pioneer

 

Keep Breathing

1 Feb

When I was little all I dreamed about was becoming a ballerina, chased that dream till I was 24 and finally realized after I graduated college, it was never gonna happen.  From the moment you have understanding of words, people fill your head with notions that you can do anything you want to, be anyone you want to.  In a very broad, pure sense it is true.  Why then couldn’t little Bethany grow up and be that ballerina?  I tried my heart out.  I auditioned, trained, did everything I was supposed to, really put myself out there.   Real life limitations happened, my body’s limitations.  I have scoliosis.  That is something I can’t ever change no matter how hard I try.  I couldn’t become a Ballerina because my shoulders are permanently hunched, because my hips aren’t even and when I bend forward you can actually see where my spine curves.  I was a good dancer but I was never going to be “great” because my body just wasn’t made in the image if a ballerina.  God made me perfect though, yes I have limitations, but he has taught me how to use them, and accept them.  He gave me Yoga.

Yoga, pure and simple, is a beautiful art form.  It is slow and focused, stimulating mind, body, and soul.  Technique is key but if yours isn’t perfect, you aren’t moved to stand in the back of the class, you are encouraged, welcomed with open arms.  Even with yoga I am constantly challenged.  My scoliosis doesn’t take it easy on me here either.  I have a harder time rolling my shoulders back, opening up my chest, lengthening my spine, than your average learner.  This doesn’t mean I am bad at Yoga though.  In fact it has taught me to stop beating myself up, have patience, work with my body instead of trying to force it.  I embrace my weakness because it has shown me my strength.  I am graceful, strong, and determined.  I may have rounded shoulders but I have long straight legs that are powerful and amazing.  My feet are built perfectly for balancing, I have long toes and a beautiful arch, my ankles are sturdy and flexible.  My arms are beautifully shaped and graceful.  The fact that I have something to work for just makes it all the more worthwhile.

No matter how much joy filled my heart when I was dancing, I always felt I was on trial, that I had to prove that I belonged.   Maybe I never did.  God gave me the want to be in motion.  I want to move, leap, dance, balance, stretch.  Yet dance was judgmental, it wanted something I could never give, it wanted perfection and I was just….me. 

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Which is why I feel Yoga is such a gift.  It gives me the challenge of mastering a pose or movement yet it doesn’t judge.  I am not less because of my disability.  I am more, I have more to offer.  I understand so much now about how the spine works in our bodies, and how to protect it, care for it.  I have a better grasp on it then probably someone who has a perfect spine and lovely straight shoulders.  Now when I start teaching I will be able to help my students that much more.  I have learned that I am amazing at the balancing poses, or the stretching poses.  While my back may be curved, it is strong and I will master back bends.

Before, when I was a dancer, if there was something I didn’t know how to do, I would berate myself and force myself to do it whether my body was ready and capable or not.  I probably caused some damage that I will definitely experience in my golden years.  Heck, I already get achy joints when it is going to rain.  Through Yoga I have become excited when I see something I don’t know how to do yet, or I don’t have the strength yet.  Because this isn’t a race, I have all the time in the world to master the Inverted Locust pose.  I am not competing against anyone else.  I will be able to do it when my body is ready, and my body is becoming stronger everyday!

I will always have a special spot in my heart for dancing, when ever I hear an awesome song my body starts twitching, just aching to be let loose.  But dancing and being a dancer are two entirely different things and I finally learned that.  Yoga is Yoga.  God gave me Yoga.  God is Good.

Happy Sunday!

29 Jan

Sunday is such a beautiful day, and such a wonderful word if you think about it.  When I think of Sunday, my mind is filled with thoughts of going to church in pretty frocks, mugs full of coffee or tea, home cooked meals, family, and love.

I haven’t been to church in a while sad to say, but I try in my own little way to keep it a special day, a little gift from God at the end of the week.  It has been hard since my Yoga Teacher Training Course is every other Sunday, so two Sundays a week, I am working hard and concentrating my brains out.  Today however I was off!  So while doing a few odds and ends around the house I made this a special day.  Started it off with a bath (not sure why but bathing in the morning with the sun streaming in is my favorite bath time),  then after filling the washing machine and waiting for it to be done, I started a new series which I actually just heard of, “Downton Abbey”.  Such a great show!  Love the grand old houses, the gardens, and the gowns *swoon*.

My poor hubby received no such luxuries today, he had to go into work, like he does every Sunday.  I am so proud of my hard-working man who I like to have something tasty waiting for him when he gets home (food, to clarify to those pondering that sentence).  So today I am making homemade granola, which I am excited to say turned out amazing!  So I am happy to share:

The Hippie Housewife’s

  “Sunday Granola”

Preheat oven to 200 degrees

Dry Ingredients:

10 cups rolled oats  (  I just bought the container that simply said oatmeal instead of instant oatmeal)

1 cup dark brown sugar

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 1/2 cups grated coconut

1 1/2 cups chopped pecans

1 cup dry milk  (should be in the baking isle)

2 Tbsp flax seeds

Wet Ingredients:

1 cup vegetable oil

1 cup honey

2 eggs, beaten

1 tbsp vanilla

1 tsp vanilla

1/4 cup all natural maple syrup

1/2 cup warm water
Mix dry ingredients in a big bowl.  Mix wet ingredients in a separate bowl.  Combine the two ( wash your hands, fingers work great for this!).  After it is fully stirred place in two cookie sheets with sides.  Heat for 20-40 mins, stirring twice during baking.  Stir again when removed from oven to cool.  Now is the time to add raisins if you want some.  Store in airtight container.

Hope your Sunday was a good one and I hope you make the granola! 

Something We should ask Ourselves

5 Jan